Self care plan in action

#107 - Self Care Plan (Edited)

Tue, Nov 19, 2024 1:48PM • 19:16

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Emma, do you want to live a life of freedom and adventure? Are you wanting more than the daily grind? Me too. Welcome to the Emma Lovell, show a place where we talk about living a life you love. Now I'm your host, Emma Lovell, and my number one value is freedom. I've spent the last 14 years running a business and traveling the world, and now I take my husband and toddler along for the adventure too. It's possible, and I know you can create a life doing what you truly love as well. This podcast will inspire, motivate and encourage you to go after your dreams, to create a life you love and to live it now, not wait for a time and or someday in the future, I'll be sharing episodes weekly about how I harmonize business travel and self care. I'll also bring on incredible guests to share their journeys, the wins, the challenges, and how they're creating a life they love. Let's jump in and get dreaming. This is a space for you to manifest a life you love.

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I would like to acknowledge and recognize Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the first peoples of this place, now known as Australia. I am grateful for the continuing care of the land, waterways and skies where I work, live, listen, learn and play from here on you, Emma country and from wherever you are listening, I pay my respects to the elders past and present.

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Hello and welcome to the podcast. Today I might sound a little more tired than usual and not quite as energized, and that is because, my friends, I am quite the exhausted, and that is why today's episode is called enacting a self care plan, because I have enacted mine, just as my chapter in my book The Art of pleasure talks about self care.

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Self care needs to be a daily practice, but sometimes you are in a season or a period where you actually need more self care than you would usually. And I've been through such a big period of my life

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that and such a big, huge achievement and change and growth, that

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it's now time for me to top up my tank. Not, don't top up, sorry, just to refill to the point of overflow. And

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you know, I'm I definitely don't think I'm burnt out. I definitely don't think I I'm not burnt out.

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But I did

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see the cracks starting to show, and the cracks got big enough

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that it let the light in, because I started saying that I was hitting the wall. But I don't think that's a wonderful analogy. Um, I think sometimes we just there's cracks, and sometimes the cracks have to get big enough that we then see the light and want to make the change so unfortunately or fortunately or how things plan out, I went and hosted my retreat in Sri Lanka. Anyone I got there, I was a bit tired,

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but I was very optimistic and hopeful that it was going to be energizing, because the year before, I hosted my retreat in India, and I came back on fire and so excited, and people like you need to have a rest after you've done that. And I was like, No, I've already had a rest. I'm I'm ready.

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And the retreats are called rest and receive

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because I truly believe when you take the time to rest you, you do receive and although there was some rest

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retreats, also require a lot of energy, and I did. I really felt like I prepared well. I

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actually went on a retreat myself to New Zealand, and that was for me. But obviously, on retreats, you also do work like as in, you do the work on yourself. So it's a big, energetic thing. I did also fly there

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to New Zealand, so that, just that took a bit more out of me. And then I

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and then I did

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a retreat, sorry. And then I had a week at home that unfortunately wasn't as restful as it would have been, because I was caring for my son solo. And then I went to Sri Lanka, and people were saying, you've done a lot and you've been traveling a lot, and you must be tired. And I was like, Yeah, but, you know, the retreats over top me up,

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um, but yeah, it kind of went the other way. And it, it, they do require a lot of energy. And there were incredible people there, and we had incredible experiences. And, you know, we did the work. But again.

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It's big work. It's big thinking work, and I do the work alongside them, and I just think

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the last two years have really caught up to me. So

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we've we were in 18 months of anticipatory grief ahead of my nephew, he passed away in July, and I think there's still some processing. They'll be processing for a long, long time, but that's still still very present, the grief and what, how that affects your energy. I then launched my book a month later, which was a life time dream, a lifelong achievement. And when you achieve a good, big goal, and you do something big, that can also there can be like a come down after

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but once you launch a book, you have to sort of promote it. And so we've been on this promotional whirlwind, which has been incredible and exciting. But obviously all requires energy,

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and there just hasn't been a lot of space in that. And one of the things I really realized on my when I attended a retreat in New Zealand, Lisa O'Neill's reported retreat, was that

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what I'm craving and what I need is calm,

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because there hasn't been a lot, and it's been very reactive season of my life, and it's been quite chaotic, unplanned and really uncertain and and we had live all lived through a few years of that. So, you know, we lived through a few years of that, and then as a world, and then we lived through that in my family, and it's a lot. It takes a lot on your system. And so, yeah, I

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came back from Sri Lanka, or even the day after, I was just wrecked. I was so, so exhausted, and I just realized that I was meant to be hosting a retreat, not hosting a retreat. I'd finished doing that. I was hosting a book launch

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the week in the week.

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It should be now in two days, and I couldn't do it. And it makes me sad to cancel things, but I knew it was the right thing, and that what I was being called to do was just to be at home. And so last week, I really did very little, very little at all, next to nothing,

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which is very rare for me, but it was really what was needed

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and what

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when I get to this sort of point,

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the self care plan has to be enacted. And so what is the self plan? Self care plan look like for me. First and foremost, it's sleep. And sleep isn't something that I find that comes easily to me. I'm working on that, and I think there's a belief around that that I can work on.

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But, you know, there's also sort of an again, my energy and when your adrenaline and all those things have been up, your circadian rhythms get changed with travel. So there's quite a few things going on. And then I have a little one who wakes up very, very early. So

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that is also a disruption to my sleep. So not really getting to set my own body clock,

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I have to work a bit harder on that. So sleep comes first,

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fresh air and nature.

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And thankfully, when I got home that was raining a little bit, so that was

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nice for me to stay inside. But it comes a point where I have to, I know I have to get outside to start feeling better.

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The day after I got back, actually went to a farm and spent some time with horses and animals, which is something

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that's my unique way of doing self care. Yesterday, I went and visited another friend who lives on a property, and I'm just trying to do a little bit more of that when, anytime I can get on the land and get on nature, out in nature,

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trying to eat well. And

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while we were away, we had a lot of delicious food and a lot of buffets, and I made healthy choices where I could, but I think just getting back into

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putting nutritious food into my body,

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that's something, something simple, drinking water, it's all the simple things you Know

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that help, because even in Sri Lanka, decided to have a massage, and actually that just brought up more emotion.

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So sometimes the things I think will help go the other way,

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cuddles with my baby, cuddles with my son,

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but I also.

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And I missed him terribly while I was away, but while I'm trying to really, really restore my energy, unfortunately, I have to also ask for time away from him too. So I'm trying to find the balance of being able to parent and care for him, but also ask for support so that I can get the rest, so that I can be the best for both of us, and it starts with taking care of myself. I'll

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be doing some more swimming this week as well. Swimming is getting into water, moving, can't look at your phone, can't touch things that that really helps me,

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and i i One of my big self care things, which I think people don't take into account and don't include, is talking to a friend,

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really selective about who I talk to when I'm in sort of place where I need to restoration,

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because it tends to be more deep conversations.

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And but I do that is a really important part of self care is being able to talk to people I love and people who are in my circle and who support me. And I think people think of self care that you need to do it on your own, but self care is doing things for yourself. It's choosing to put yourself first. It's finding ways that things that give you joy. So like I said, spending time with my son. We went

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in. My husband, my son and I have just been doing things like playing board games,

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turning the TV off, and making putting music on.

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I took my son for ice cream the other day, just just that was the activity. Just went and we sat in an ice cream shop, and that was just just a simple activity. As us being together, we went with flying kites, just very wholesome basic things,

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things that fill up your heart, that make your heart feel good. And the other thing I've been doing is I've been rereading a couple of books that I love. I just reread Big Magic, which is about creativity and big ideas by Liz Gilbert,

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and knew that there were some really great pearls in there, and that when I feel ready,

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we'll just it's ways to kind of tap back into creativity when you don't feel it, but also allowing that. And then I've started reading the way Louise Hayes I can do it, which is an affirmations book, and I really turn to affirmations as well as some trusted meditations. So I've got a really great energy space clearing one from my Kinesiologist, and I love listening to Chelsea Pottinger on Insight Timer.

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Journaling is another one that really helps me, too. So just and and trying to, I'm trying to to journal affirmations,

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because not so much

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venting and, yeah, but we'll just see what comes sometimes that needs to come out. But, yeah, really working on on affirmations, which are positive phrases that are in the future. So take you to the future. I am, I have.

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And so when you you know, so if I said I'm a good sleeper, I have good sleep, I have good rest,

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you know, you start to believe it, and it comes true. So those are some of the things that I do for self care. And that's just a I

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just wanted to share a little bit of where I'm up to that I do, practice what I preach. I literally opened my ebook the other day, almost accidentally, and it opened onto a page I might read you that page actually,

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I'll read it on my in my book, not on my ebook, though,

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but I couldn't believe the page opened up. I had been to see the horses the day before,

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and I had,

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yeah, been to see the horses the day before, and I had

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just sort of decided to enact this self care plan, so

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I'll read what I shared in the book.

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When I felt the familiar signs of burnout and need to need to sleep. I do wherever I must. I leave my phone in another room. I take some melatonin, magnesium or both. I drink herbal tea, take a late night bath or a hot shower. I use my Lush sleep spray and put on my Lush sleep body cream. I get into bed early and I rest even without sleep to help me throughout the next day week or season.

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A bedtime routine and self care activities make me feel better each day. I top up the tank a bit more and build on that foundation. I'm not always great at it. There's nothing more annoying.

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England, someone saying, Go to bed. I feel like a Tom a toddler, but sometimes it's what's needed.

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Yeah, that was one section that I read, but I read another one which was so great. It was like exactly what I had done, and I can't find it. Now, you'll have to read the book.

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You'll have to read the book, dang it.

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No, can't find it. There you go. Gotta get more familiar with my own book, or I'll just recommend it to you to have a read. Where's the bit about horses? Can't find it. But anyway, I also start to put boundaries in, and really, really strongly put boundaries in, and that one of the phrases that I share is boundaries mean saying a small no for a greater Yes, and it's saying yes to you first, saying yes to your needs, saying no to their needs so you can say yes to yours. Is a really powerful one that I share. You know, what's interesting is the layout of the ebook is so different to the layout of the book, and it looks so different that I Oh, here we go. This was the bit I said,

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even though there's so much going on, I stay committed to the pleasure life, and I build it in time to sleep, to eat well, to do what I love. This year, I feel called to spend more time around horses. When I was asking myself what I needed, what came to my mind was, I want to be around horses. My goal is to go horse riding more often. It's something I've always enjoyed, and my inner child wants that joy. Horses mean freedom, beauty, strength. They are graceful, wild and free. They're calming, but also fun. And little girl Emma always wanted a horse being around them now satisfies her. It's something I love and enjoy, so I'm going to do it. It's a new and fun way for me to experience self care.

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Yeah. So yesterday, even visiting my friend, we could see horses in the paddock, two paddocks behind, and they regularly go and see that horse. So I said next time, we will arrange the neighbors to go and visit. But you get to decide what self care looks like for you.

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Basically, these, these things become like your tools, your tools that you can turn to when things feel a bit challenging, and it's okay to say I'm not okay. It's okay to say I need a rest.

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It's okay to share that more publicly like I am, and then to do what is needed, but you also have to ask for support and encourage around that to ensure you get what you need. So

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ah, it's the end of the year. It's that time, and I think a lot of us are feeling it. So you please, please do one act of self care this week. I'd love to hear from you, to hear what what your go tos are.

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I have a list in the book of suggestions, and I ask people just to do one, to do one, but also maybe choose your top three that would really support you. So that's all for today. Lovely.

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If I haven't plugged it enough, please pick up a copy of The Art of pleasure I share very honestly and openly where I get this right and where I'm still learning. Sometimes we win and sometimes we learn, as Jodie fox said, and

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I am definitely learning, and as I grow and change, as we all do, all right, have a wonderful day. Take care of yourself. Do something nice for yourself, and I will be with you again next time.

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Thank you for listening. Lovell one. I hope this has inspired you to dream big and start creating a life you love. Today, if you love what you're hearing, don't forget to follow and rate on Spotify and rate review and subscribe on iTunes. It helps other awesome people to find this podcast and get motivated and inspired as well. Want to stay connected, come and join the live a life you love. Group on Facebook or connect with me on Instagram. Emma lovell.au the same as my website, but all the details are in the show notes. Lovely. I'll see you next episode for more inspiration, motivation and freedom seeking. Now go out there and live a life you love. You.