I will not stay silient with Sarah Rosborg of Rafiki Mwema

#68 - Rafiki Mwema - Sarah (EDITED)

Tue, May 28, 2024 9:45AM • 1:03:51

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

people, volunteers, sarah, love, children, trauma, charity, money, girls, kenya, house, give, constance, retreat, funds, sponsor, blogger, big, fundraiser, rafiki

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Do you want to live a life of freedom and adventure? Are you wanting more than the daily grind? Me too. Welcome to the Emma Lovell show, a place where we talk about living a life you love now, I'm your host, Emma Lovell, and my number one value is freedom. I've spent the last 14 years running a business and traveling the world. And now I take my husband and toddler along for the adventure to it's possible and I know you can create a life doing what you truly love as well. This podcast will inspire, motivate and encourage you to go after your dreams to create a life you love until you get now don't wait for a time and or someday in the future. I'll be sharing episodes weekly about how I harmonize business travel and self care. I'll also bring on incredible guests to share their journeys, wins the challenges and how they're creating a life they love. Let's jump in and get dreaming. This is a space for you to manifest a life you love.

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I would like to acknowledge and recognize Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the first peoples of this place now known as Australia. I am grateful for the continuing care of the land waterways and skies where I work live, listen, learn and play. From here on you can bear country and from wherever you are listening, I pay my respects to the elders past and present.

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I am so excited to introduce you today to our fabulous guest Sarah Rosberg. She is the founder and director of Rafiki wema, which is an incredible organization. Sara, who founded this organization fell in love with Africa in 2005, sparking a life long commitment. After surviving a life altering car accident she turned her pain into purpose, teaching herself to design to support Kenyan children in need. In 2013. Faced with rethinking women's potential closure, she rallied support, raise funds and founded the Australian branch. Sarah's tireless efforts have transformed her thinking Wimmer from a rented property to Doyle farm, which has been a haven for hundreds of children. Her vision extends beyond aiming to break the cycle of abuse and provides a state a sustainable future through outreach and feeding programs. Sarah is quite frankly, the most passionate founder I've ever seen in my life. I met her when she was speaking to the Bulaga ProBlogger in 2016, eight years ago, and I was captivated by her message and her mission. I can't wait to share this episode with you. And as the Murphy Wimmer

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sort of message comes out, I will not stay silent. We will not stay silent about trauma and abuse. And this is such a testament to all of the work that we're thinking we're doing. We also have a very exciting announcement in this episode. So please stick around

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and check out the show notes as well. Introducing Sarah Rosberg.

03:00

Welcome to the podcast. Sarah rose full of roughly chemo. Mr. Bell, thank you for having me. Thanks so much. It is long overdue. I think I've wanted to have this conversation with you for a long time. But, you know, I would just in a few words, will it tell us who are you?

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I am Sarah, the founder of rethinking Winmark, which you'll hear about today, and I am married to a lovely Swedish man. I live in Lenox head on the Northern Rivers, and I am mother to a 12, nearly 13 year old daughter.

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I love it. And I met you in such an interesting way. I remember it very clearly, I think you've might have mentally blocked it out. We were at ProBlogger conference in 2016 on the Gold Coast, and you were speaker.

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You were petrified because you were speaking you also told me that you were very stressed. But I just wanted to hug you. And I did were You were you working better or you're in the crowd. I was in the crowd and you were wearing your I will not stay silent shirt and I said well done what you're wearing again today. I have I had one I think I kind of got lost or something. So we'll have to figure that out. But I loved the message on it. I loved what you talked about. I loved everything you stood for. And I said you know you've said very important things but where can I get your shirt and can I give you a hug and remember I remember that and yes I'm I actually am having flashbacks I totally remember. You were just so I've never had seen someone be so vulnerable and so passionate like to cry but not in a like, like you so honest about you because sometimes people who are founders it's great to be polished and to be able to get present your message but obviously not polished. I don't think that's the word we need to use.

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It's so refreshing is like so

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committed and passionate and dedicated and you cared so deeply for these children. Like you can't help but not if anyone sees you speak, they can't help but want to know more about refeeding and what you do. So, I was in hook, line and sinker, and I've been following the journey now eight years. Well, we're gonna be doing some very exciting things together. But, you know, for the audience who don't know how to Rififi start? Oh, yes. I mean, if that was eight years ago, far out, I was only very new, a couple of years old, really, I think we would have just got the farm. So going back 10 years now, it

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you know, there's a real long story behind how I got to Kenya, I traveled to Kenya first about 20 years ago, nearly so old. I'm nearly 50. I'm 47, I think I'll have to ask my daughter, she remembers.

06:02

And I traveled to Kenya about 20 years ago. And I had done some work at an orphanage there and continued to work for that orphanage after that, had my daughter and

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had a friend who was in Kenya who had a girl's house that had been started to support girls who had suffered sexual abuse, who were going through the court system.

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Prior to this house being open, there was no way for girls who had been raped to go to, before they testify at court, because a lot of the homes, there's a real stigma around sexual abuse. And it's like people didn't know what to do with these girls. So there was a huge,

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a huge gap for where these girls could go prior to testifying. So they before this home, they were being put into a remand center. And that's kind of like a jail for kids. That's what I call it, where they were, you know, could sometimes wait up to three months, we're talking kids from two years old and up. And while they're waiting to go to court, you can just imagine they've been further abused. And then by the time they get to court, they're just ruined because of the trauma that they've suffered in the home. So this home was started to support the girls to, you know, work through their traumas prior to testifying. And my friend reached out to me, who I met from my previous years in Kenya and said that she was about to close the house down because she had no funds for to keep it open. And I was a young, I was a mum, I wasn't a young mom, definitely. But I was a mum of a young one. And I had a full time business. And I had chronic pain because I had had a car accident years before. And I was so busy. And you know, I thought I can't do this, like I hardly even had time to talk to this lady. But I thought I'll just do a fundraiser and get us a chunk of money. And the fundraiser took a long time. But we did that mean my local friends, and then handed over the money was about 17,000, which was really exciting. But you know, then when that money is gone, she's not going to have any other money. She wasn't very good at fundraising. So after a couple of margaritas with my girlfriends, I had said to them, you know, because, you know, you couldn't help but be connected to these girls, after you're doing this fundraiser and talking about the work we're doing the work that she's doing over there. And if it closes, this is what's gonna happen. I couldn't just walk away. I love Kenya and I love the Kenyan people. I just said to my friends, you know, I'd started a charity help start a charity before in Australia. I know what's involved. Are you keen to help? Couldn't say no, because they're a little bit drought. And here we

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kind of that was they will agree with me.

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And from that moment on, within about

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I think it was about two months from when we kind of made that very loose agreement. We had enough sponsors to sponsor those girls in that house and cover the running costs for that house, which was initially about $5,000 a month.

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And it started from there. So we really started with one rental house and that house was called We're faking wema. So that's why we named that charity in Australia. We're faking. And from there.

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Just having wonderful supporters. I mean, ProBlogger was a big, big start for me because I met a lot of the bloggers who I had supported through my web design business like Shentel from Batman slim and rebel, a lot of people who came on as ambassadors in the early days.

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I'd met them at ProBlogger. And it was a really exciting thing to, I couldn't believe that they chose me. I think I was on the floor with the Sanku crew and I loved them. And I was, I mean, you saw me I was petrified. I'm still petrified speaking. I mean, even having interviews like this, I get really nervous, but in front of I hardly leave my house. To get up on stage. We use all the state of me so.

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But from then on, we we've just been going gangbusters. I said, I had a web design company. You right. I had a web design company back then when

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we did the fundraiser and started the charity first, but

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I had to wind that down after a few years because things just got busier and busier with Rififi as we grew, and I just had no time to run that business and manager fakie at the same time, and I closed that in about 2018, and have been full time with Rififi since then, that's when I when I closed my business, that's when I started taking away from the faking writer that I was just volunteering and covering all the costs of rific move through with from Castle design my company and went totally into debt. And it just wasn't sensible. So I knew I had to take a wage and was still just take a minimum wage for 38 hours a week work, which is like a small portion of what I actually do in a week. But as long as I pay my bills, that's really all that I care about.

11:42

And I would care about getting one more employee soon to help me that would be really helpful because volunteers have been what's helped us to date, but it's really difficult to run a large organization, you know, with the help of people doing an hour here and there. You know, that's such a good point about volunteers and about that consistency. Because, yeah, it's a lovely thing to have. And people I think always say that with a not for profit. So like, why don't you just get more volunteers, but not having that consistency of support. And in the volume with the SEAL team of ours, because, as you said, they can only give it, you can only really ask them to do one or two,

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then they burn out pretty quick. Right? Exactly. And there's, you know, we have such wonderful volunteers, who are, you know, people give it a lot more than an hour or so

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a week or a month, depending on their circumstances. But like you said, they do burn out if they do much more than that. And of course, when you're volunteering, they've often doing that outside a full time job or outside a full time job and a full time family. And understandably, because I've been a volunteer for a long time as well.

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We are the first thing that they have to drop if they're sick, or if work gets busier of the children gets sick. And you know, if they drop the work that they're doing, who's going to pick it, there's only one person to pick it up. And when that happens with lots of volunteers, it's me who's picking it up. And it's always grateful to the volunteers. So never, you know, this is nothing on them. It's just part of life. And that's the hard part about keeping the admin costs down. With a charity. We've worked really hard for the last 10 years to keep all of our running costs as low as we can by not having any we have 1.5 staff in Australia, so I'm full time and then we have a part time lady who helps me with marketing, but everyone else is volunteer, and we have no marketing budget. So you know, we can't do any social media ads, no promotions, everything is done by word of mouth. And that makes it really difficult to raise funds. And, you know, yes, you need to spend money to make money, but we are on such bare minimum money that we don't we cannot spend the money because it'll be a matter of spending money to push on socials. But we won't be able to pay our staff in Kenya this month. You know, it's we don't have we don't have funds in the bank that are just there. We're living month to month, which is

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quite a heavy load on the shoulders after 10 years. I can tell you. Yeah, well, and I think people are very, I don't know, there's such a skepticism and a lack of understanding. You know, the reason I was I was at ProBlogger. But I was also at that time, a World Vision blog ambassador.

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Were we Okay, Lulu Eden Okay. Lou Atchison who was in charge of the social media at the time and random blog ambassador program. So I was already had been a blogger and then I had joined the program maybe the year or two years before, so it was nice to be there with

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With my hat on, have that. And so then that's when I heard your story I really understood blogging or sharing story on behalf of not for profits, but actually did do a contract working with World Vision as well as being a blog ambassador, which was a voluntary role. And they get so much stick actually worked in the media team. And like, it's like, every couple of months, a story comes up about how charities spend their money. And then people like they're spending money on admin, and it's like, and we look at paying

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for car, how do you?

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How do you how do you think these things run? And it's like they should up volunteers? It's like, do you volunteer at your job? Like, I said, I asked if I got paid? And I was like, I just would say back, do you get paid at your job? And they're like, yes, yes, I get, I haven't, why when you do something that's good. Are you expected to do it for free? Something that's capital, and working for a big company that are making money and doing nothing for anybody, they don't get questioned? And I always feel

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I don't know the word that I feel I feel I have to justify me getting paid by all, you know, I always upfront on over transparent people say, shut up now. And then well, often, but I always have to explain, you know, I do get paid on paid a minimum wage for 38 hours a week when I do about 70. Plus, but you know, it's like, Why do I have to do that I know that I work. More than enough. And I, you know, I just because of the stigma around it. And I do also understand why because there are a lot of charities that do take too much money and don't give enough to the cause. But as I say to people don't not give to anyone, because you've heard that story. Or, you know, there's ways that you can look at the books, everyone if they're legitimate charity, all their books should be available on the ACNC. website and on their website. So look at their expenses, look at their income, and, you know, outgoings and see how much money they're spending on admin and so on. And waste been the bare minimum. But yes, it's, it's tricky with the volunteers, and just having that consistent help. Because when the volunteer does get too busy, it falls back, like either jobs don't get done, or the urgent stuff that needs to get done, will fall back on on my shoulders. And you know, everyone says, Sarah have a break. It's like, I, you know, I'm the foot I want to have a break. And I have I am now learning to take holidays after

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10 years of not taking holidays. But it's not always that easy. Just to take a break when there's no one who will be able to fill the role. You know, it's not an option. Yeah, absolutely. And it's almost,

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there's so much more responsibility than it's not just being a business owner, it's, you know, there, there are people really dependent upon you, and you've taken that lead. It's not just the children in our care, but we have, you know, 46 staff in Kenya, who rely on us getting wages to them on the 18th of every month, and this month, we're behind on getting those wages to them.

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But they have their families that they need to feed as well. So it's, it's a big responsibility, but I love it. And there's, we've survived from

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everyday people. I like to say not people with a lot of money, but people who give 510 $20 and think it's not much.

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They have kept us going because we don't have any large sponsors other than Constance Hall, who is a well, I guess, she's a blogger. She's a businesswoman. She's our biggest sponsor, we don't have large funds, we don't get grants, we don't have any government funding. It's all from the everyday legends who give us, you know, small amounts that add up. It does all add up. And it does. And I love that grassroots and community fundraising. And I've had the experience of it through tour managing tracks and cycles and seeing people that they do raise 1000s. Actually, we have trips that raise anywhere from 40 to 120, or we've had up to $200,000. Because 20 people are raising 3000 5000 10,000, minimum of three.

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You know, they're going out there and like we talked about our fear, like, yeah, that we need the money, but you need the awareness as well. And so that one person, those those 510 20 people doing that fundraising in their local community, get to talk to another 510 20 100 people. That's an audience of possibly 2000 that you didn't have before. Yes. All right. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, the, I always think of the fundraiser that Constance did, which is the turning point for us, I believe, from when we went from a small charity to a very busy, large charity where we

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I tried to raise funds $70,000 And we thought, that's hilarious, we're never going to get that and we raise $200,000 from about 6370 people raise that much money. So so many small donations added up, it was incredible. Because I always say it on my face, but I'm like, I have 2000 people on Facebook, if you all donated $2 Today, if my targets 1000, I would reach that, you know, or I need however many people like, you know, $1,000 is 20 people donating $50? Yes, not a lot. It's that people think they can't make a difference, or they can't spirit or whatever, or it's so just too hard. So I like doing this rule. What you know, what does $5,000 look like? It looks like 100 of these 10 of that? One, you know, one amazing person?

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Oh, that's actually tangible. 500 people? Do you keep $10 I could be one of those 500.

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And a lot of people I think don't as I'm trying to say a lot now because we're pushing a fundraiser before in the financial year, because we've we've lost so many sponsors, our fund income this year is nearly $300,000, less than last year.

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So there's we're only paying our minimum things like just food, wages and education over there. There's no extras.

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I say, often people don't give something because they think $2 or $5 is a little bit embarrassing. Like, I don't want to I'm not going to bother doing that. Because it's not much and what's that going to do. And it's like, if all of you were 56,000 people on our Facebook, if all of you would give $2 You know, it just makes such a difference. And don't think that $5 is not enough that would feed five of our kids in town each day. So it all adds up. And it all does make a difference. But yeah, so you know, but we know the state of the world. It's tough living at the moment. But you know, you said the volunteering is the first thing to go. I've had times where things are not great. Like can I champagne problems, I'm very fortunate and have a lot of support. But you know, I'm I'm broke in, in that moment of, you know, I can't make my own bills. And I had it suggested to me a couple of times, you know, maybe you need to stop sponsoring that will vision child or maybe you need to stop doing this. And I'm like, that's the last thing to go. I remember having at one point, like, Yeah, I had like, $60 in my account, and my friend was doing a swim. So I gave her $10.

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Like,

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why? And then I'll go have some but I'm like, What? What I don't know, no, I think that's such a bad like, such as bad road to go down to stop those things. And I love it. altruism, true altruism, which is like, generate generosity and, and giving back. It's 1%. And so when churches asked for this, you know that fiving to be altruistic is to give 1% of your income.

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You know, and 1% You know, I think I worked it out. I was like on 100 grand is like $1,000. And I was like, Cool. I sponsor two children, and I do a few other donations throughout the year. Wow, I'm actually meeting that altruism. And I don't notice it. I don't Yes, that's right. A lot of people, you know that a lot of people priority priorities are different. And, you know, us lucky people. Our version of broke is not broke, I guess. Okay.

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Okay, that's right. You know, we can't afford that. We're going to Europe so we're broke. We don't have enough money to spend here because of our being tripped over there and not begging anyone that goes, you know, targeting Sarah.

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We don't I know, I'm very transparent about my life choices. And I am the problem. It is me. But not at all so at least you admit it though. But I'm just saying Albert, even myself our version of broke is is not broke you kidding, where it's just our priorities and where we've spent our money. You know, my husband and I, we've had to sit down I've got my little Excel spreadsheet out of my budget and how much money we have to put away each month out of our wages to cover everything but we've at least got money out of our you know, we can pay out our bills each month if we if we manage our money properly. You know, a lot of a lot of people were in Kenya and not possible at all. But um, you know, I do believe we're lucky that we can do that, but we're not broke. Yeah, absolutely. Now tell me with the farm. When did that so you said you were renting the house for the girls. When did the farm come to be and what does that look like now because I I'd love you to share about the castles are used to the farm. So we started renting the small girls and I believe

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If it was,

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I think I spoke about it at ProBlogger.

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Actually, I'm having flashbacks, I think I got the news of these girls. When I was at ProBlogger. That weekend, I was in the audience and that last speaker

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spoke, I can't remember her name, but I got a message about these two sisters who were in hospital. So our house was full, and we had no room for any more girls. So that was at the ProBlogger. Time and on that.

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The last day, I got a message about two girls that were in hospital who had had reconstructive surgery, because of their injuries. And we didn't have any room to take them. And we also didn't have any extra sponsors to start another house. So I remember thinking, what are we going to do we have to we have to take these girls, they cannot even sit down. Like what what is our option. And then speaking to my team, we spoke spoke about getting another rental house, which would be like the big girls rental house because there was all different ages in that house. Now we would split up and keep small girls and then bigger girls in the other. So I think that next weekend after ProBlogger, I did a fundraiser, to raise funds to get a new rental house and cover costs for three months and staff wages and furnishing and all of those things to get it up and running. And we did that. So then we had two rental houses. And that was to bring in those two girls. And again, it filled up so fast. But after getting that rental house, a local couple to me who had followed my charity work, they said

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I went to lunch with them. And they asked why I was getting another rental house and I explained and they said well, why don't you rent and not buy? And I said, you know, just because I don't have any money, just the norm. And they said well let us get you a house then Sarah and I went okay, thanks. That was grandma and grandpa Doyle, as we call them. And

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one thing led to another we were looking just to get a really large house or a property where we could put these two houses on and that led to finding this 14 acre farm that had a house on it already and some cow sheds and things so we purchased they purchased that outright for us, which was incredible, unbelievable. And we moved the small girls straight to their house that was on there the house that was existing on Doyle farm. And then we still had so that skipped a few stories here in the time when we got the second rental house there.

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Were doing a clean up as they say of the town in the curve for some Polit politics and stuff. I don't know when they were cleaning up the street children they say were they it's just the worst thing imaginable. They were taking children out, you know, to the bush and leaving them or even doing worse. So

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cattle real long story short, we had two rental houses for boys street boys with us. So at this stage, we got two girls houses two boys houses. We move one of the rental houses of the small girls to the farm. And now we've got three rental houses outside the farm. Then, as I always, as I mentioned about before about awareness, I always think of this story where one of our wonderful sponsors, Jessica, I don't even know where you are anymore. Jessica Hello, darling. She wrote to Constance Hall, who this is 2016 she her posts had just gone Sorry, I've got really bad asthma her Coast had just gotten

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a huge reach on Facebook. She's funny, and she got really big and Jessica wrote to her about

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the Queen's like out because that's Khan's thing about the Queen's and spoke about, you know the girls in our care and the Queen's and sent some photos of her sponsor kid. And Constance wrote back to her straightaway and said, This is exactly what I want to do with my platform give me Sarah's number. So I kind of I started talking straight away and we hit it off and we were wanting to do a fundraiser where we would

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we spoke about bringing the big girls that second rental house for the big girls onto the farm so we can build their house there forever house on the farm. And we thought I'll go try and raise 75 or 70 or 75,000 to build the house. We just got a rough quote and

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we thought yeah, we'll call it the Queen's castle. How exciting and this isn't going to we're not going to get this but let's give it a go. And when we launched She didn't give me any notice. I was in the middle of a meeting about trying to build someone a website and she

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Like I've just launched, I've just launched it and the website crashed. And I'm like, what? Oh, my God, and the website went down because there's too many people trying to donate. And I quickly fixed it. And then I mean, every time I refresh that crowdfunding page, it was going up like $4,000. It was unbelievable. I was I had to excuse myself from the meeting with this lady because I couldn't function. My girlfriend's came over. And I just, I was so excited, but really overwhelmed and so happy that these funds were coming in. But you know, the awareness and everyone was talking about it. People were ringing me. It was just massive. And by that night, there was 150,000, I think. So it was about 170,000 within 24 hours, and then the 200,000 like to get to 200,000. That happened over about a week and a half. I was literally waiting to stop it at 200,000 Because so I have an issue with everything being perfect.

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We got the 200,000. And we were blown away. But it wasn't just the money. It was just such awareness. So many more people knew about Rififi, I think we had about 2000 followers on the Facebook page. Before that ended, which I was really excited and proud of that amount of following, which I thought was huge. It went up to 30 plus 1000. Overnight, and that's when you know, the money we've got a lot of money. Initially for the Queen's castle, we've got a lot of interest, which doesn't always turn into money straightaway, but the admin and everything just took over. Like it just turned into such a massive workload, which I love. I love this work, but that's when I had to give up my business and so on. But with the 200,000 Obviously it was more than we had planned for we were able to build a bigger house for the bigger Queens Castle house, which is a large house that is split in two. So at the moment, it has initially it was the big girls on one side and volunteers on the other side. And then so it's a large two houses say in one then we were able to build up office which is the cutest little hut. The photos are on the website and also another kind of transition house for any girls that come into Rififi. It's called McKeon Vitosha, which is translated to small Angel.

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It is a house a little hut as well, which is next to the small girls house where any children can come in. Prior when they first come to us, they go into McCain MotoTRBO just to be with their Auntie or their key worker, and they can just chill out in there and come to the small girl's house to eat and play. But if it gets too much, they go back into Mikimoto so we were able to build four buildings for the price of what we'd planned one was amazing. I love just I do remember the time and seeing it blow up and it's just incredible that power and

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that momentum and just Yeah, people carrying it was like I mean, I don't know I don't know if you meet Sarah have you here like I'm getting emotional. I can't I don't know how I could not

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have been you know, you must have no heart if you don't give her a freaking womb if

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you're listening. You're heartless and you come along.

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But you're about to donate so that's no problem.

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Sorry, are you well, can you just tell us what we're fake? I know are fake. He means it means a friend. But what does Rafiki murmur mean? Yes, it means a loyal friend. So We're faking? You probably know from The Lion King is Rififi is translates to friend but yet when we're thinking Where am I is a loyal friend. And that's what we are to these children.

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Many times but we also have

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with the boys houses that we had,

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they wouldn't have named all of the houses just so we knew what we're talking about. We had Rafiki familiar which is Rafiki family. That was the boy's house and we have another program at the moment called and freaky Mitanni which is a friend on the street, which I will explain later but I'll just quickly go back to Constance from then Constance has been a very good friend and support from raising awareness and those funds for the Queen's castle but she's supported in other crowdfunding when we've not had enough funds, month to month but she then published her own book and she said that she would give $1 from each sale to

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build the boys house and so we could get the

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Boys out of the rental house to Doyle farm, and she sold 170,000 copies of her book. So she gave us $170,000. And we've built the king's castle, which is again, a big house split into for small boys and big boys. So she actually came over to the opening of the king's castle with denim and her

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two step sons and Raj when he was a little baby, and we had Yeah, it was it was amazing having her over there, and she was there for the opening. But she's been a great support, just always raising awareness. Like I'm about to reach out to her any day because I need some funds, big time. So she will help me push out to her people just to try to get some sponsorships and some funds in she'll always be like this is from the era of where the bloggers rule that guest bloggers were the initial influences.

35:57

It's pretty cool. Coming from that world, because I like when he's like, I'm a blogger and people like the logo or you know, if you wrote anything in mind, like you're a blogger was his fascination, but then you know, like the likes of Eden Riley and Constance hall like some of these people with their a bigger readership then some magazines and publications. And I think I love that constancies using her influence in the way that we would imagine an influencer and unfortunately influencer has become a dirty word in a way. Because they're not always influencing for the right reasons or influencing the right thing. They're doing it for themselves, which is fine. We all live for ourselves, I suppose. But you're just doing no good with it, you know, 1% that we talked about? Could you not give 1% of your feed, or 1% of your messaging 1% of your time 1% of that income? Like, you know, not everyone's getting the monetary income, but like, yeah, influence. And I think,

36:57

you know, back to what we said about the people making $2 donations, you don't have to be what Constance done is, is is incredible, but you don't have to have a following of hundreds of 1000s to have you influence my know that I've people have bought products from refeeding women because I've talked about them. I know that people have sponsored children through World Vision because I've wanted children through World Vision, you know, I think, you know, you can have like just telling, if you listen to this podcast, and you hear Sarah's story and rethinking women's story, you could tell one person about that that's influenced you don't know where that one person will lead. Like I said, when Jess wrote to Constance, look what happened? Well, the oils just we need a house. Oh, I'll buy you a house. Why are you renting? Silly? Billy? Oh, my God. No.

37:46

That's right. So you just I just sharing a post or telling someone the story, you have no idea where it will lead. It's just as valuable. And all this one person can't make a difference. I'm the biggest one to say that I just think what I'm doing anyone could do. And it's not much it's i But one person can make so much difference. And you just just keep at it and be persistent and annoying. And never stop and never sleep and be like me. No, no, we're working on that worker. You're attached to humble Sarah because I do. I did connect. You know, and this is the first time I've seen Sarah, we're on a zoom. In probably eight years. I wanted to come. Like let's talk a little bit about him. I know we've been a while but I would I want to talk about you do do some work in Australia, and I wanted to come to you held that trauma workshops. I don't know if you're still holding holding them. But I really wanted to come to that. So it was like, you could probably tell us a bit more. But you know, I really liked

38:51

having my awareness open to what trauma is and the impacts of trauma.

38:56

And you know, we do have that in our in society. So it's like, I think because people could have that thing of like, why are we helping Kenya? Like why are we helping these children like you because you could have a heart be? Yeah, okay. You want to help here. So how do we what how, what's the impact of trauma here? Like? What was that all about? Yes. So the lady who I who initially had started the house before when I started Rififi. And so, back when when my friend reached out to me, the lady who had started the initial rental house, she was a play therapist. So

39:33

we went if we were doing fundraisers in Australia, we would try to recoup the costs for you know, and of any admin costs in Australia by running these workshops where she could do any trauma informed care training and we thought at the same time, it would be a great way. We're obviously everything I do is for faking Walmart to raise awareness for Rififi, but we always had so many people reaching out to us saying

40:00

You know, you're giving these staff in Kenya, this wonderful training on trauma, and how to deal with children with trauma. I wish we had something like that in Australia. So I always had lots of people wanting this kind of therapy and help in Australia. So we thought it would be a good way to spread the word, but also help, you know, around the area. So there was a few trainings that we put on, but then it came into COVID. And we all know what happens. Yes, there really? Yeah, well, it was something I remembered about that and that I hadn't got to come and repeat his in my awareness every day, because I have these beautiful cards when you had a shop there affirmation cards with beautiful artwork and beautiful messages on. And so I look at them every day. And I was like, you know, talking about the type of selfless person you are, I host my retreats, which are all about rest and receive which I'm currently six, I need my own dose my own medicine.

41:03

When we rest, I believe when we take rest, and we take a break and we pause, we create the space to remember the bigger vision or to remember what's important. And then we're able to go after or receive an opportunity, like the universe is like, Okay, you're listening now. Cool, we'll do that. But part of rest of receivers is a lot of self care. It's a lot of

41:26

I think retreats are generally quite a healing thing. And so my next one is in the Northern Rivers of New South Wales, and because you are also based in that region. And we were kind of brought back together recently through one of your chair, board members, the wonderful Lou Acheson, and I was like, why don't we get our fakie will Sarah to come and talk about refeeds he talked about trauma and talk about the healing.

41:56

On the retreat, it feels like a really good

41:59

fit to me so excited. I'm really looking forward to that. It's a lack of forced wrist might just come through the day. It's big. Yeah, it's the best way to do it, you know, force me into it by making me talk about Rififi and resting well done you

42:19

a little bit strategic there, but I just think we're gonna give the cards to my gorgeous attendees as well. But I think just that, yeah, we do. Like, don't we don't understand the impact of trauma and to any degree, and I think that there's that we can do trauma comparison or trauma Olympics of like, Well, I haven't been through what those children have been through in Kenya, therefore, who am I to feel hurt, like, you know, feel challenged by something. It's like a bit. Like we said before, you know, yeah, we're not broke, but we're broke for our, for our area and for our lifestyle and for what we're used to, and, you know, I always have my friends.

43:00

The ones who put up with me, you know, I don't I'm not the best at keeping in touch with everyone. So thanks to those that are left I love you all. They it's really hard for them to complain to me because they know

43:14

that I want to say something. So I know this is you know, first of all problem, Sarah and I say you can still complain. Like I complain a lot. It's okay. Just because I'm, you know, listening to these stories or dealing with this every day. trauma is trauma and problem is a problem. And it's okay, as long as your

43:34

complaint isn't too ridiculous, because I'll always let you know. Go ahead and complain.

43:41

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44:53

I don't think it's a helpful dialogue either to you know that people often say oh, there's children starving in Africa and it's like, okay,

45:00

But I cannot relate to that I will never be in terms of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, like Touchwood. But I don't think I'm going to be in that position. And even though, you know, things happen, but I can't relate to that. And so it's like having perspectives. And no, it's it's having a perspective. And I've had the benefit of visiting my sponsor child in Tanzania and visiting programs in Uganda. I've been to Kenya. So I have seen firsthand Yes, the situation, and the needs and the wants, and the like, the life that they need is different to the life that we have here. And so it's that thing of going, Okay, well, what, what do they need, you're telling us what the children need, and asking for what is needed. And actually, that is fun, so that you can provide what is needed.

45:49

And then working out what you need in your life. And maybe it is a higher level, and it is some counseling, or it may be he's in retreat, and that feels very bougie and luxurious, but

46:01

do you need to be forced into rest you do need? That is something you need? Because you've got food, you've got a house, you've got some money sometimes? Exactly. I absolutely do. And I have learned that the hard way.

46:18

You know, it's very, you know, you can say Have a rest, and I still do it now. But there was just no possibility of rest for so long with no helpers. And it was growing at a rate that wasn't,

46:30

you know, it was just growing at such a fast rate that I just had to get the funds in. But, you know, when I crashed and burned, which has happened quite a few times, if I stopped being able to work for whatever reason, Rififi, would stop today. And that's really scared me and scared myself with my daughter as well, because I was so unwell. And so working so hard, that

47:00

you know, there was some scary moments. And I just thought, if I'm not here tomorrow, what happens to my daughter, and what happens to all of these children and all of this stuff, so I, you know, have some wonderful support around me. And I've just like you've said, I, I am getting better at stopping. And that's not just having a holiday that's stopping at nighttime, like not working till I crash at 2am. And then waking up at eight and doing it all again, and just serving dinner, and then walking upstairs with my dinner to continue working, and then all my daughter's 13. And I just remember giving birth to her at work. There's so much that I've missed and that's my choice, but now I'm learning to rest in the day and to take risks and be without feeling guilty. That's really important. Mother's guilt is amazing. Or there's guilt to my child here and my children then.

47:59

But, yeah, resting is very, very, very important and not comparing your traumas is very important. They're different worlds, as I say to my friends, when I go to Kenya, like I was in Kenya in March, and I came back, it's like going to a different universe. I'm a different person here than I am, their life is different their life that it's not it is stressful for all the reasons that you can imagine. But life here with everything that we've got to do, it's so busy, busy, busy, busy, busy, and everything is so full of it over there. It's very simple. And I love it so much more. It's so much easier to manage. You know, it's just very simple. You know, they're not living for all of these things that we have. They're just living which can be sad as well. They're just living to survive that day. And that's all there is to it.

48:54

Yeah.

48:56

Everything we need money for and we're rushing I'm gonna answer the phone and text them last like imagine just working to get your food that day. Even on our podcast was interrupted twice by delivery

49:11

crap that I've ordered. You're like to

49:15

I pulled a card for us because from our vehicle

49:20

which is lovely. It's beautiful. I haven't had this one for a while it says sometimes you outgrow people sometimes that person is your yesterday selves. And that's okay. And we were yesterday so she's still asleep. There was one actually in here that I really like because I you know, my my past sort of focus was personal brand and my coaching was around personal branding. There was one that was like, it really like conflict like I really challenged challenged by it because it was like it says like, you never promised to be the same person today as you are tomorrow. But my message is like, I fundamentally believe that you are who you are. Yes.

49:58

Still can be different though. Yeah, but you

50:00

Do you evolve and you grow and so, it took me a while to be okay with that was like, no you are who like you are the same, you are the same, like you don't change the four of you is I think it's rediscovering the true you is what we're trying to do. And not caring as much about what people you know, not what people think of you. But you know what I mean? As you get older, you learn more and there's you learn about what's important and what's not. And you give a fuck less. Yes 00 To give a question for you. And then we're gonna do some shameless plugs. What does living a life you love look like now.

50:44

Living a life I love is I love my house. I love being at home.

50:51

I always have with my daughter and being present with her without, you know, whatsapp on one ear with reports coming in and chaos and dealing with that while pretending to be there with her. You know, I hate camping. But going camping with her if she's enjoying herself, you know, being there for my husband who has dealt with me being absent for 10 years.

51:20

But also by giving and spreading the word about

51:25

the need that there is in the world with Rififi, but also about

51:30

sexual abuse and speaking up about it, I think it's really important I am always fascinated. And with

51:41

I have to live a life where I am

51:45

helping other people because of how lucky I am. And I just wonder

51:49

there's so many people out there that only live for themselves and that's okay, but I'd

51:56

doing what I do makes me so happy and fulfilled that I never stopped.

52:03

People know me, it's all I talk about either a fakie or Loviisa. Because nothing else. It's not always a good bit. Nothing else fulfills me.

52:13

I love I love doing what I do. The stress of the money is what I would love to change obviously, to be so easy, but I'm just that stress. And obviously I want to stop child sexual abuse. And we're working on it but the stress of the money and just freaking out every month. I'd like to change because I'll be dead soon. But the work that I do and promoting it and speaking up and it shocks people but it's it should shock people because people just sweep it under the carpet too much and it's horrific. But and

52:47

so I go on a tangent Geez. And but people say what why are these young girls gets raped in Kenya? This is disgusting. What's wrong with these kingdoms? I'm like, Are you kidding me? It's happening in your hometown. I can tell you right now it's happening in Linux, it is happening in Byron Bay. It is happening everywhere. Don't be so ignorant. And we're just better at covering it up here in Australia. We're very good at covering it up and just pretending it's not happening. Like just It's fine. Don't and this is great for these pedophiles to go. They'll cover it up here. I'm in their pedophile manuals on how to rape children. And they're like, do it in this town because everyone will be ignorant to it. Do it in Australia, they you don't get thrown in jail for life. Like you're doing Kenya. It's a lot easier to go to countries where they ignore it. I mean, anyway, how's it need to for you? What did you eat? You're so passionate. Sarah. It's what I was drawn to buy in the first place. I love your heart. I love that. You can't switch it off. I mean, I will you know you're working on that. But I think when you have a passion and you know what you're living for? Then it does come at clearly. And it's you know, it's sometimes it's a big issue, but it's also a simple like, what everybody's answer is different. And it's what I love on this podcast is everyone's different answer is different. Everything is unique to them and and we shouldn't have to apologize for what a life. You know, I asked you what a life you love looks like. Yes. What I think not what a listener thinks it's what you love. And you know, those children that Kenya's communities have you to thank and all the supporters but Sarah, like, you're humble, you're too humble. What you've created is phenomenal. And I will always be here to champion it. Oh, thank you. Thank you and thank you. Yeah, I mean, I've only been a small part of it. Everyone who's donated and all the volunteers and people, you know, board members and ambassadors and everyone who's donated and helped and the staff in Kenya they're the ones that have

55:00

Have the hard job. So what's the simple way we can donate today, just to the website, which is you could just type in refeed key charity in Google, because nwim is not that easy to spell or type Rififi Castle into Instagram, Facebook, you will find us. There's a Donate button on the website on the front page at the moment is our current fundraiser. But there's all lots of information on there about if you wanted to sponsor an ongoing basis, or any donations from $2 are tax deductible. You know, it all helps. And there's links to volunteering on there.

55:44

If volunteering with your skills, I think it's a really great way it was something I meant to say earlier, I actually went to trek Mount Kilimanjaro in Tanzania, which overlooks Kenya, and I had a conversation with a friend there about I travel a lot I go to, I had been going into your life, and I was like, Yeah, but next time I go, I want to get my hands dirty. You know, I really want to, I want to give back, I want to do something because I was already there doing a charity challenge. I've always been donator and give her and he was like, I was like yeah, like, you know, I go to a school, you know,

56:17

build a house. He's like Emory, your builder was like, and he's like, Oh, do you have childcare? Experience? Or are you a nurse or like, no. And I was like, he's like, so

56:29

how are you gonna help. And it's like, it just changed my perspective so much. And he actually used to run an organization called the fundraising people. So they would put the people out on the street who could get fundraising that say, you know, legitimate experience in the space. And he said, In the Your gift and your skill is marketing, and communications and promotion, use your skill set, and I get like, tingles because he changed the course of my life. You understanding how I could use my voice and use my skills of writing of promos, shameless promotion, marketing, and that I could volunteer those skills or raise money. And I personally have raised, I would say, over Neil, at least over 80,000, maybe close to 100,000 for various organizations and hate laws.

57:15

Because that isn't good doing what you love as well. Yeah, doing what I love, I get to go on tracks, I get to go on cycles, or, you know, I get to talk about things that I care about. And so you might have skills in in accounting that is needed or legal services that you could donate or marketing or social media or, or promotions, or just be able to write something? Well, copywriting is, that's right, we often have the jobs that volunteer roles that we have open on the website, but there's something on there that says, If you don't see it here, write to me and tell me what you are good at, and what you love to do. And as I tell the volunteers, if I if you're given a job to do, and you don't like it, you're not vibing it or whatever, you know, let me know, because I think it's really important that you, you enjoy what you're doing. Otherwise, it just becomes another chore. And that's when the volunteer doesn't turn up to do anything. Like it's important you love the job that you are doing, or the volunteer position that you're doing. Because it's exciting for you. If you don't love it, someone else will. But there's if you have a skill, let us know what there is. I mean, there's every type of seeing, we need help with every so much. So money is important. But skill sets are so important. And it was such a shift for me learning that I wanted to share that because it was game changing in my life, to recognize that I could use my voice and then I saw your shirt, because I will not stay silent. And I think everyone's like yeah, Mo like you talk a little bit like no, I will not stay silent about this. I will I will not and I will say those things that we don't want to hear you know, yes sexual abuse trauma rate. Not pleasant to talk about but isn't the Hamlin has to. And

59:01

I think that is important. That's how I started doing it. I didn't have any money and but I was using my skills to support and then when I started my web design company, I was building websites for charities for half price, which would always end up free but we I had to say half price otherwise I would be inundated.

59:25

But and as you said before you wanted to get your hands dirty and get in and build a school and I that's how I started going to Kenya I wanted to go and do that and build a school but I can't even I can't even hold a hymn.

59:39

And then now I've learned after lots of years and lots of mistakes and lots of learning and learning the culture even more. You know, people often say can I come and look after the kids or build the school or build their house and you know, we have had volunteers before but now we don't because

1:00:00

As we employ local people we have, if you, you know, first of all, I'll say why what what can you do that the local Kenyans can't do? If you can bring a skill that they can't do, we might consider it. But you'll probably find that I'll find a Kenyan that can do that. And if you want to come and build a school, then you're taking someone's job, and we pay them less. Yes, but that's just the normal wage. We you're taking their job, like there's nothing that the Kenyans can't do. And my mission has always been that it would be completely Kenyan run, Rififi. So, there's lots of things when you want to go and help a charity just consider the local people and that you're not coming to take their job. And often, I know a lot of organizations that have had the white folk or whoever come over and build the school the houses and then they have to knock it down and do it properly when they leave, because they don't know what they're fucking doing. And they just mess it up what they don't know. And then they have to get the locals to come in and do it properly. And there's Yeah, I just think consider the local the local people and not just coming to do it for the photos and things like that. I mean, that well employed and it's nice, slim feel good. But like I said, I feel even better that I could share this message.

1:01:27

You know, maybe another Sara said, she doesn't enjoy it. So maybe this would be broke, like get share Sarah's story, you know, get Sarah you know, to get that message out there like not because I don't enjoy it, it doesn't mean I won't do it. I will do

1:01:41

that I'm gonna make a commitment today, publicly on this podcast. I'm gonna get off this call. I will making a $50 donation today. I'm honored, reflecting where my cards at least the affirmation cards I've ordered at least 20 There's not many left. So if you want them

1:01:57

thank you. I will also be Sarah will be coming to the northern New South Wales rest and receive retreat all of these links will be in the show notes. Sarah, we'll be there isn't for everybody and not telling you what it is, you'll get a surprise gift, you'll get an amazing conversation. But I will also be donating 10% of revenue, not profit 10% of the revenue for that retreat, regardless of the amount to reflect whatever. So. Thank you. That's fine public declaration today. Yay. Thank you. And thanks for listening to the ramble. I go off on a tangent. I forget what I'm speaking about sometimes, but that's me.

1:02:35

You're incredible. Sarah, and those kids are so blessed. And the work you do is so important. So thank you for being here. Oh, thank you. And yeah, nice to see you again. After eight years and going to the Vasa your again before eight years now in a few weeks in June.

1:02:55

July. July. That's right. I'm going to Sydney in June. July.

1:03:00

I'll be there. Thank you so much, Sarah. Thanks so much.

1:03:05

Thank you for listening. Lovely one. I hope this has inspired you to dream big and start creating a life you love today. If you love what you're hearing, don't forget to follow and rate on Spotify and rate review and subscribe on iTunes. It helps other awesome people to find this podcast and get motivated and inspired as well. Want to stay connected. Come and join the live a life you love group on Facebook, or connect with me on Instagram. Emma lovell.au, the same as my website. But all the details are in the show notes. Lovely. I'll see you next episode for more inspiration, motivation and freedom seeking Now go out there and live a life you love